Some moms have either experienced this or know a mom who has. Raising a child without a biological father can be filled with uncertainty, sadness, and many more emotions. I was one to deal with this. Somehow, life led to my ex-husband going down another path that didn’t involve me, and there I stood, three months pregnant and alone.
I went through pregnancy alone and birthed my son with my mom by my side.
I went through the first year of his life as a single parent. Through it all, my thoughts always reverted to “my son deserves a father”. At some point, I had accepted it would only be my son and I. Then, shortly after celebrating his 1st birthday, I met the man who would change our lives.
When my now husband, Wes, and I first started dating, I was very hesitant to allow him to get close to my son.
It was so different and fresh, I had no expectations. As we got more serious, I admired how well he interacted with my little toddler. From playing with him to getting him his milk, Wes was always so happy to take part.
Then, the anticipated conversation happened.
Jaylen was learning to speak and the question came up: “What should he call you?”. Without hesitation, Wes responded, “If you are okay with it, he can call me Dad”. I was initially shocked, but then in that moment, I realized he truly loved the two of us and was in this for the long haul. He WANTED to be his dad, unlike my son’s biological father.
Wes’s family, from the first moment, loved my son as if he was biologically theirs. This made everything even more organic. I truly believe things were meant to happen for a reason. We then began the process of terminating my ex-husband’s parental rights and were successful after two years.
We are now in the adoption process, so legally, Wes will forever be his dad.
Although this process has shown to be taxing, those who know us are so supportive of the journey and already consider my son’s last name as Copeland (Wes’ last name) because that is his dad. My son is a Copeland. Legal or not, this is the man who will fight until his dying breath to protect and be there for his son
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He is the dad he didn’t have to be.
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